Kaldheim Set Review - White
Jamie will be rating the cards on a scale of 1 to 10 for limited play. Melvin is just being Melvin.
Other Colors
AXGard BRAGGART
Jamie: 5/10 hill giant that can grow/mana sink
Melvin: He keeps showing everyone his beta lands and lightning bolts. We get it!
BATTERSHIELD WARRIOR
Jamie: 6/10 pump team on attacks for cheap, threat of activation
Melvin: pulls up chair. “So, you’ve decided to meme on Captain America…”
Battlefield raptor
Jamie: 5/10 epic bird, looking to be equipped
Melvin: Sure that raptor seems cool until you realize it cost the Starnheim government 350 million gold per bird.
beskir shieldmate
Jamie: 5/10 3/2 power and toughness for 2 mana is a decent deal
Melvin: Woah, slow down! I’d prefer that we just be shieldfriends first.
bound in gold
Jamie: 7/10 cheap removal
Melvin: I do the same thing with trespassers but my pit is filled with nacho cheese.
clarion spirit
Jamie: 7/10 can easily draft cheap spells and get lots of value from this
Melvin: I tried that everclarion spirit in college mixed with punch. I had a hangover for two days.
codespell cleric
Jamie: 4/10 will be filler for second spell decks but not super exciting
Melvin: He took one of those “learn to codespell in three weeks” courses online. Now his spells are very object-oriented.
divine gambit
Jamie: 4/10 removal but also a huge risk! ok late game when opponent has no hand
Melvin: In divine chess, is every piece a pawn?
doomskar
Jamie: 7/10 won't deal with fortell creatures
Melvin: This is my nominee for “Best Name for a Metal Band That’s a Magic Card”.
doomskar oracle
Jamie: 5/10 filler for the draw two deck
Melvin: Is his belt the head of an axe? He better not bend over.
giant ox
Jamie: 3/10 decent in vehicle decks, also adorable
Melvin: Better a giant ox than a giant ass, I suppose.
glorious protector
Jamie: 7/10 decent flyer, the etb effect could reset (albeit, slowly) bound in gold creatures
Melvin: The top of her spear looks like a banana…
gods’ hall guardian
Jamie: 4/10 filler
Melvin: Yes, choose an animal to guard your halls that sleeps eighteen hours a day. Good idea.
goldmaw champion
Jamie: 5/10 the boast can tap down a blocker after attacks, unimpressive body
Melvin: Is there a Goldpaw Champion?
halvar, god of battle
Jamie: 8/10 bomb, equipment buildaround, plus annoying as equipment
Melvin: If he gives double strike, wouldn’t a better name have been Doublvar, instead of Halvar?
invoke the divine
Jamie: 4/10 filler/sideboard card
Melvin: I once accidently invoked the bovine. It was an udder catastrophe.
iron verdict
Jamie: 8/10 the foretell is solid, removes most creatures for cheap
Melvin: Iron price jokes aside, it looks like this contestant is getting chopped in round one.
kaya’s onslaught
Jamie: 7/10 the foretell is going to get people!
Melvin: Welcome to “Knives Out - Kaldheim Edition”
master skald
Jamie: 6/10 solid body and effect
Melvin: If you don’t want to skald your dwarves, be sure to add them to the soup a little at a time.
rally the ranks
Jamie: 7/10 tribal buildaround
Melvin: Good to see the Kaldheim Amazon employees finally unionizing, even if most of them are ghosts.
reidane, god of the worthy
Jamie: 6/10 mildly annoying for snow decks
Melvin: Party on, Reidane! We’re not worthy! Or maybe we are, you tell us.
resplendent marshal
Jamie: 8/10 solid body plus that effect could be buffing 3+ creatures late game
Melvin: What’s that long white thing right in front of her face, a horn? Seriously, that seems like a terrible place to carry it. I don’t have a joke here, but that horn thing is really bothering me.
revitalize
Jamie: 3/10 filler, probably makes the cut for two spells deck
Melvin: Taste the rainbow… on my hands!
righteous valkyrie
Jamie: 7/10 angel/lifelink tribal, solid stats
Melvin: See, this angel has her horn/trumpet thing attached to a rope or something for easy carrying. She just needs to watch out for that Protoss building behind her that’s being teleported in.
rune of sustenance
Jamie: 7/10 replaces itself right away, cheap spell for 2nd spell matters deck
Melvin: Finally a rune that’s both Keto and gluten-free!
runeforge champion
Jamie: 5/10 runes are uncommon so this isn't always relevant
Melvin: I guess the writing’s really on the wall with this card. And it’s on the weapons, and the armor, and the dwarves themselves…
search for glory
Jamie: 5/10 cheap enough tutor that will most likely gain 1-2 life
Melvin: I’d rather search for snacks.
sheperd of the cosmos
Jamie: 7/10 foretell makes it super appealing
Melvin: A foretell card that returns a cheap permanent to the battlefield? I bet your opponent never herd it coming.
sigrid, god-favored
Jamie: 6/10 the exile effect is nice but seems like a fragile body
Melvin: I'm more into syrup, god-flavored.
spectral steel
Jamie: 5/10 value after enchanted creature dies is useful
Melvin: Interesting that it’s a white card. I always expect to see blue steel.
stalwart valkyrie
Jamie: 7/10 the alternate cost is great
Melvin: Okay, I guess all the Valkyrie have horns or something. I guess you have to take them as they come, stalwarts and all.
starnheim courser
Jamie: 5/10 windrake with upside
Melvin: I don’t know if I’d peg this as a good card in draft. Depends on how good the artifacts and enchantments are.
starnheim unleashed
Jamie: 9/10 bomb with foretell cost late game
Melvin: Be sure to check your local area’s leash laws to know where you can unleash your Starnheims.
story seeker
Jamie: 5/10 bear with lifelink can't be bad
Melvin: This a story all about how my cosmos got flipped, turned upside down.
usher of the fallen
Jamie: 7/10 2/1 for 1 with upside, please sign me up
Melvin: If I knew any Usher songs I bet I could make a killer joke right here.
valkyrie’s sword
Jamie: 7/10 late game bomb
Melvin: Stupid horn not included.
valor of the worthy
Jamie: 6/10 cheap spell for 2nd spell matters deck, plus leaves behind spirit, solid
Melvin: Oh sweet, what infinity gem does he have in his forehead?
warhorn blast
Jamie: 5/10 foretell makes appealing
Melvin: Look out, she’s putting all of y’all on blast.
wings of the cosmos
Jamie: 5/10 can turn a big threat into a surprise win con
Melvin: I’ll take 24 wings please - 12 Spicy Garlic, 12 Asian Zing.
